I'm absolutely excited and thrilled to bits (and a tad nervous, I admit!) about flying to Spain this weekend for the Concurso Caballé(!) Besides the fact it's the competition of the iconic-and-amazing Montserrat Caballé herself, it's also making me think more about my upcoming audition and competition season in general.
I've been intensely preparing my audition repertoire, and I gained experience performing these arias in public several times, as we singers typically do. I'm realizing, though, that my biggest goal for the upcoming audition season is far less about checking off a to-do list of things to prepare, than it is about a simpler, but in-my-opinion more difficult goal: that of simply showing up fully and being seen. As simple as this may sound, it takes a lot to fully expose yourself in front of an audience, even in the best of circumstances. I think that if I can go out and do that, then there is no bigger success than that. I know there's a 100% likelihood that I will think about the things that could have gone better in a performance I gave, and will surely be working on them continuously (eg "That note was a bit flat," "the high note wasn't as good today as it usually is," "I closed that 'e' vowel too much," etc etc etc.). However, going out and daring greatly is a victory that I want to make sure I never lose sight of. (Brené Brown moment, anyone?!)** I think if one does that, then you put your best foot forward in an audition. I don't mean all of this as treacly-sweet-"you-get-a-pat-on-the-head-and-a-gold-star" talk. I mean, I want to make it a point to remind myself of why I think opera singing is so special---it's a chance to vulnerably and transparently share a lot of who you are with people, and by doing so dare greatly. This is my main value, and no matter what happens in this audition season, I know I'll be able to find my way home (so to speak) by reminding myself of that.
Now, ¡Vámonos! :)
**P.S. I realize that Brene Brown is talking about romantic love in this video, but I think her point about daring greatly is very pertinent to this blog post. :)