four letter word

Four-letter words and high notes

When I started going out into the professional world of opera, I felt a lot of pressure to be the darling (so to speak!) of every audition I did. Regardless of the fact that I knew rationally that this goal was unrealistic, I still felt that pressure: it was part-and-parcel of the terror of putting myself out there in a major way. If I didn't get a competition, then it was certainly because I was doing something wrong. (*cue the ominous music!*)

Soon after, I was working on a duet in a coaching. I missed a high note, and, well, let's just say I then blurted out a very, very, VERY bad word. I felt absolutely mortified, and apologized profusely!

My coach didn't seem the slightest bit fazed by my cursing, or my missing that high note! To this day, she is still one of the biggest advocates for my career, and has written countless recommendation letters for me.

Funnily enough, that coaching was what the doctor ordered: it helped me realize that I should focus more on the people who love me even after missing a high note and blurting out an expletive, rather than people who don't hire me for whatever reason. While I definitely don't advocate cursing in the middle of lessons or coachings(!), I definitely think that the more one lets go of trying to be all things to all people, and being perfect, the better it is.

Now: Avanti!